Abuse and Crisis Helplines

Psychotherapy can be an effective means of addressing the aftermath of abuse and all forms of interpersonal mistreatment and can help us develop the life skills necessary for protecting ourselves and meeting our needs in all kinds of relationships.  However, it isn’t intended to be used for crisis intervention. The following is a list of…

Using The Resources Section

Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” ~Aristotle This resource section contains a collection of articles designed primarily as password-protected psycho-educational material for use exclusively by my patients who currently attend sessions weekly.  It also contains some open-access pages, some of which may help people who are looking into personal development or psychotherapy work…

Psychotherapy Support During the COVID-19 ‘Lockdown’

The government response to the Corona Virus (COVID-19) pandemic has resulted in severe restrictions on the citizen’s rights to freely move and travel.  In the UK we have been told by government not to leave our homes unless absolutely necessary, leaving millions of people disconnected from friends, family, employment, and support services they would normally…

Mindset Part 10: Self-healing and Loving Kindness

Entitlement and Lack of Generosity I looked that the entitlement mindset in an earlier article, which examined how this mindset is a symptom of unmet infantile needs that carry the expectation that other adults owe us something. Freud referred to the Anal stage of child development in his early theories whereby interruption of the stage…

This Cold Hollow: children born to parents who don’t want them

How did I know that you had left me before I knew the words for empty, lost, bereft?  Before my birth scar?  Before I witnessed the guillotine of your contempt?  Before I could control my bowel, or tie my shoe, or awakened trembling in the night. Before you scoffed at me as I learned to…

We Are Affected by the World

“A fire broke out backstage in a theatre. The clown came out to warn the public; they thought it was a joke and applauded. He repeated it; the acclaim was even greater. I think that’s just how the world will come to an end: to general applause from wits who believe it’s a joke.” ―…

Mindset Part 1: Ambivalence in Psychotherapy

ambivalence 1. simultaneous and contradictory attitudes or feelings (such as attraction and repulsion) toward an object, person, or action 2. a. continual fluctuation (as between one thing and its opposite) b.uncertainty as to which approach to follow Merriam-Webster   Ambivalence as an Asset Ambivalence – the urge to go in two directions at once; to…

Psychiatric Diagnosis Part 1: a guide and caution for the weary

This post seeks to give an overview of how upsetting or distressing human experiences can be viewed and categorised as illness, disease, defect, disorder or dysfunction requiring the special expertise of specific treatments, therapies, interventions and pharmaceuticals for effective ‘cure’.  It is not my intention to devalue the choices exercised by patients who elect this…

Mental Distress and Suicide

Statistically, suicide is the highest cause of death in men between age 20 and 49.  The suicide statistics are shocking, with greater numbers of men taking their own lives than are killed in road accidents, or by cancer and coronary heart disease.  Of the 6 233 suicides in the UK in 2013 (male and female),…

Considering Starting Psychotherapy or Counselling?

“Everything depends on inner change; when this has taken place, then, and only then does the world change.” Martin Buber Facts Here are some brief facts about Psychotherapy and Counselling: You don’t need to have anything ‘wrong’ with you to benefit from psychotherapy A psychiatric diagnosis is not required to understand, work with or overcome…

Dissociative Identity Disorder

Still Like A House Fractured?  No, curiously I feel fractured but I see myself in the mirror and I’m whole, standing still like a house.  The mirror may be fractured, but my eyes still swivel like windows in this head, guided by a nose that acts as a weather vane.  I open and close my…

Ways of passing the time

Indifference Here I am and there you are.  And there’s the clock on the wall.  I pretend I don’t want anything from you.  You pretend you don’t want anything from me.  Our pretending binds us like a form of artificial intimacy.  And keeps us hungry, a million miles apart. Conversation I pretend I’m listening to…

Recovering your self in 7 days

Hollowday There’s a hollow in me; an absence.  Like a piece of furniture missing from a room I haven’t been in for years.  I enter knowing something’s changed and I can’t say what.  There’s just the feeling.  Hollow. Dumbday I feel dirty on the inside.  I scrub the outside; wet hair, towel and soap, and…

PTSD, cPTSD, and Dissociative Experiences

I wanted to write something about the relationship some of us have to traumatic experiences from our past.  It seems important that I write this from an intuitive, non-technical place.  For me, this is because intution – as opposed to fear – is what we need to develop regarding our power to manage our way…

On choosing a psychotherapist

When choosing the right psychotherapist it’s important to remember some basic facts about psychotherapy if you want it to work for you: Psychotherapy is founded upon a trustworthy, secure relationship.  The best evidence from the longest-term study supporting psychotherapy’s effectiveness in helping people make changes in their lives says that the quality of the therapeutic…